Friday Gratitude - Thanks A Million

I would like to thank all of you for making my birthday truly exceptional. Your individual love and warm wishes were touching and utterly magnificent.

One question: How did you all know it was my birthday? I thought it was a guarded secret. Do I have a security leak? Perhaps someone who has access to all of my top secret files? Someone who sees me daily. Someone who sits and watches me, while I work? Hmmm? Who could it possibly be?

What’s that? The keyboard seems a little jumpy. It looks a little flush. It’s turning red. Is it choking? Should I turn it upside down and slap it on the back? Maybe I should perform the Heimlich Maneuver and see what comes up? Wait. I think it’s trying to say something.

“I...I...it was me Alexys. I did it. I told them. I had to talk to somebody and they were there.”

You told them?

“Yes, they are really nice people with lots of love to give. As much as we all like to receive love, we must give it too. It’s the way of the world.”

How did you become so wise keyboard?

“By watching and listening to you.”

Me? No, I can’t take the credit. You must have been watching and listening to many others before you even got to me.

After all, you were put together in a factory first, while people were talking. Then you were inspected while people were talking. Then you were wrapped and packaged while people were talking. Then you were shipped to a warehouse or retail outlet where people were talking. Then once I selected you, you were shipped out and handled by the United Parcel Service where you again overheard people talking.

People often reveal deep truths when they speak. It’s probably a combination of many factors, including listening to others, your own perspectives and experiences that make you formulate your opinions and ideology.

The way you perceive things, and reproduce them constitutes your spiritual identity. When you can dilute the thesis with a spark of original thought, the crack in the theory forms the antithesis. When you put the pieces back together, you essentially synthesize a new view of the experience and thus a new theory.

“I see. If something is like we see it, it is not necessarily wrong, it’s just the way we see it. I think I understand, but I’m not sure. I’m just a keyboard, I’m still learning.”

In other words, you may think that you were doing a good thing by letting the cat out of the bag and rationalizing it as being lonely. Whereas, I may have interpreted it differently. However, I didn’t. I think that you acted from love, not loneliness and your actions caused a ripple effect of love.

Your seed of love was watered by others until it grew so enormous that it was felt on the deepest level and it will be felt for many years to come. Thank you keyboard. You are the wise one, not I.

I had a wonderful birthday. I did everything I wanted. Great dinner. Great company. Great cake. The complete first and second season of Nip/Tuck with those gorgeous plastic surgeons. (Review to come) What more could I ask for? It was special, just like everyday God sends us is special. This one had extra love and that was really nice and it was all due to a keyboard.

My next task? To program 15,000 songs into my Archos. That should be fun with a capital F. I don’t even have 15,000 songs. Looks like I’ll be making a long CD list for my next birthday. Any suggestions?

I am grateful for all of you taking the time to wish me a Happy Birthday. They reached the deepest parts of my heart. Thanks a million. Same time next year.

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Alexys' Birthday

Hello this is Alexys’ computer. Since it’s her birthday today, I gave her the day off. She really hates having any days off because she loves what she does. She believes that we should all do what we love everyday, even if it’s a few minutes. Whether it’s listening to a good song; watching a good movie. Taking a walk. Blogging. Anything that makes you feel aligned to your Soul.

She likes all that soulful stuff. It’s the reason she is doing this -- to share what she has learned over the years and what she learns everyday.

If what she has learned can help someone else, she is happy. Wait, she is a happy person anyway. There isn’t much that makes her unhappy. I can’t think of anything. Really. She has set her mind on automatic happiness. I don’t know how she does it. She must have an “IN” with the powers that be.

She left me here by myself. She doesn’t know I am doing this. She wouldn’t like it if she found out, but she would like that I took a risk to do it. She’s into risk-taking, throwing caution to the wind and mastering her own destiny.

In fact, she taught me everything I know and I taught her how to dream by letting her fingers do the talking. We work well together.

I know that she really likes you all and she is dedicated to capturing those little increments in life that makes its tapestry. Sometimes she writes until all hours of the morning until her shoulders get sore and her fingers get stiff. She can’t wait to tell you what’s going on wherever she is at any moment.

I also know that she likes gadgets. I am looking at one of her gifts now. Whoa, check this out. The Archos 604 Portable Media Player. It plays music, video, photographs, records voice, T.V., has a great 4.3 inch TFT screen and more. Wow it’s so cool. I wonder if she will be spending as much with me now. I hope I haven’t been replaced. How could she do this to me?

I feel a crisis coming on, I need Alexys. Okay calm down. Everything is going to be okay. That’s what Alexys would say. Anyway, she will be back soon. I hope she saves some cake for me.

Happy Birthday Alexys! Hip Hip Hooray.

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Little Voices

I want the best for you. I want you to be happy, fulfilled, find peace in your life. I want you to be the best you can be. To be strong, loving, kind, courageous. To make good decisions. To have a good life.

I want it all for you. We only have a specified time on earth to be happy. There is no reason that you shouldn’t get everything that you strive for, but some people don’t strive.

They listen to the little voices in their head that say, “You can’t do this. You’re not ready. You don’t have the skill. Everyone else is better than you.”

Those who you think are better than you still had to start somewhere. They had to contend with those same little voices. They had to find the courage to slit the throat of those negative little voices and take a step forward. You have to do it too.

You owe it to yourself to at least give it a shot. Don’t listen to people who don’t believe in you. Don’t give credence to the little voices that are there to derail your dreams.

For every step you make, you’re one step closer to your realization, whatever it is. I want you to realize every gift in your heart, but you have to want it too. Don’t you want it?

Your dream is waiting.

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Rules For Being Human

People are not born with instructions. For that, we rely on our parents or guardians to instill character, integrity and the ability to decipher right from wrong.

I was going through some of my important papers and I was reminded of this little gem. It was given to my by a coworker about ten years ago. Every time I read it, it brings solace to my Soul. I hope it does the same for you.

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's the only thing you are sure to keep for the rest of your life.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, Life on Planet Earth. Every person or incident is the Universal Teacher.

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of experimentation. Failures are as much a part of the process as success.

4. A lesson is repeated until learned. It is presented to you in various forms until you learn it: then you can go on to the next lesson.

5. If you don't learn easy lessons, they get harder. External problems are a precise reflection of your internal state. When you clear inner obstructions, your outside world changes. Pain is how the universe gets your attention.

6. You will know you've learned a lesson when your actions change. Wisdom is practice. A little of something is better than a lot of nothing.

7. "There" is no better than "here". When your "there" becomes a "here," you will simply obtain another "there" that again looks better than "here."

8. Others are only mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another unless it reflects something you love or hate in yourself.

9. Your life is up to you. Life provides the canvas; you do the painting. Take charge of your life, or someone else will.

10. You always get what you want. Your subconscious rightfully determines what energies, experiences, and people you attract; therefore, the only foolproof way to know what you want is to see what you have. There are no victims, only students.

11. There is no right or wrong, but there are consequences. Moralizing doesn't help. Judgments only hold the patterns in place. Just do your best.

12. Your answers lie inside you. Children need guidance from others; as we mature, we trust our hearts, where the Laws of Spirit are written. You know more than you have heard or read or been told. All you need to do is to look, listen, and trust.

13. You will forget all this.

14. You can remember any time you wish.

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Wakey-Wakey

"Our truest life

is when we are
in our dreams
Awake."

~Henry David Thoreau

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Comprehension 101

Learning is so thoroughly invigorating. Brain food makes my blood circulate. It makes my heart pound a little faster. Makes my spine tingle. Makes my mind sit up, beg, roll over and do all sorts of tricks. Watch for me on Amazing Human Tricks -- coming soon to a television set near you.

There really isn’t a downside to learning. We do it everyday whether we want to or not -- in our waking lives and dream lives. It’s the nature of our overall comprehension.

God is in the details. There have been times when I have researched a subject for months just to find the right detail -- even if it is one or two lines, detail brings authenticity to any piece.

I am always researching something or another on the internet. Usually a link takes me to another page and another one and another one until I am so far from where I started that I get sidetracked. This time it was worth being derailed.

There are no accidents, only incidents. This is what I saw that day. Thought it was written by an anonymous person, I wish I knew who wrote it so I could thank them for such insightful words of wisdom. Hope you find something that resonates with you as I did.

I’ve Learned...

that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved.

that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

that it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.

that you shouldn't compare yourself
to the best others can do,
but to the best you can do.

that it's not what happens
to people that's important.
It's what they do about it.

that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.

that you should always leave loved ones
with loving words.

that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.

that there are people who love you dearly,
but just don't know how to show it.

that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

that just because someone doesn't love you
the way you want them to,
it doesn't mean they don't love you
with all they have.

that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.

that you should never tell a child
their dreams are unlikely or outlandish --
what a tragedy it would if they believed it.

that it isn't always enough
to be forgiven by others.
You have to forgive yourself.

that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

that just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other.
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do.

that we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

that you shouldn't be so eager
to find out a secret.
It could change your life forever.

that two people can look at
the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life.

that your life can be changed
in a matter of hours
by people who don't even know you.

that even when you think you have
no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.

that although the word "love" can have
many different meanings,
it loses value when overly used.

that it's hard to determine
where to draw the line between
being nice and not hurting people's feelings
and standing up for what you believe.

that you can get by on charm
for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.

~Anonymous

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Where You Should Be

How many times do you come to a realization and think to yourself, ‘If I had only known this before?’ We are under the illusion that we would be further in our jobs, relationships, careers and be up on the competition. We think we would be happier or better off if we knew back then what we know now.

The truth is that we are all exactly where we should be at this exact moment and there is nothing wrong with it. It is exactly where God has navigated us.

Explorers map the earth, astronomers map the heavens, geneticists map chromosomes, we map our hearts and God maps our Souls.

We have performed incredible tasks. We may not realize it, but in some way or another, we have crossed landmines, driven through roadblocks, made wrong turns, survived quick sand, climbed mountains, been up a creek without a paddle, swam through sharks -- everything a spiritual adventure affords us.

Though times make us exhausted and make us want to quit, we emerge unscathed; unless we count a few superficial scratches and a little emotional bruising. The spiritual battle is worth the fight -- and worth the glory.

If we could see the map of our individual existence, there would be a big red dot that reads, ‘You are here.’ Then in parenthesis, it would read, ‘Exactly where you should be right now.’

So when you think that you are not getting anywhere in your life, just chill and know that you are further than you think.

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Moral Aptitude

What is your moral aptitude? Your moral responsibility? In other words, what are you truly capable of doing? How much do your decisions hurt you? Or other people?

Your moral aptitude is regulated by your conscience. Gut reaction, gut wisdom. Have you ever done anything that you’ve regretted? Are you more likely to do secret and random acts of kindness?

There is always a voice that guides us in a certain direction. It either takes us into a consequence that we regret or in which we rejoice. When it comes down to it, human beings are basically good, but somewhere down the line, something has happened to shake their faith in the world and the people around them.

A good moral aptitude is the ability to exercise good sense in a way that does not harm you or anyone else. It’s a win-win situation. Nobody gets hurt.

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What Kills Friendship?

As children we pinky swear that we will be best friends for life. We share adventures, secrets, laughs, tears and everything else in between. We just know that we will be friends forever. Then we grow up, reality sets in and redefines friendship.

What kills a friendship? I mean, what really murders it until it is beyond recognition? Betrayal? Backbiting? Truth? Does it just fall part because we grow in different directions? Ending any relationship, especially friendship can bring anger, sadness, hurt, resentment and loss.

So why does it happen? Why are some people friends for life and others friends for minutes. Some people would lay their life down for a friend. Others would betray a friend in a New York second. Friendship is a special bond. It’s when we merge ideas, feelings, even common goals with someone else. I’ve known people who have been friends for years, then suddenly, they are enemies. I think that there is probably a duration period for everything, including friendship.

I had a good friend once. We used to work together. Our boss would often have to separate us because to him, all we seemed to do was laugh. Although we were still working, we had too much fun doing it, according to him. Once, the boss separated us into different rooms. As soon as he left, we would be up to mischief again. It made the tedious work of editing go a lot faster.

We did many things together. Lunch, movies, dinner, movies, trips, family get togethers, and more movies. We even wrote together for a while. Our spiritual goals were the same -- but our spiritual make up was entirely different.

Although she swore that she had faith, she didn’t have faith in relationships. I knew the story all too well. She would meet a man, offer him everything and then he would run away because he couldn’t handle it. She never understood why?

I used to tell her that she gave it away too fast and she would say, “That’s the only way to keep him.” The more I told her not to do it, the more she did it. No matter how much advice I’d give her, it didn’t replace the sheer fact that she had to crash land without a parachute. She would often crawl from the wreckage and I would help to put her back together.

Needles to say, our ideals about relationships are completely different -- and mine are undermined by the very industry in which I happen to have a stake -- the film industry.

The film industry doesn’t make it easy for women. Men get all of the great action adventure films such as, 300, Gladiator, Indiana Jones, James Bond, Troy, Batman, Superman, Spiderman, while women are stuck with the romantic comedies, also known as, “chick flicks.”

Men are portrayed as superheroes, princes, warriors, super cool spies, gods, and handsome billionaires, while women are portrayed as witches who have to cast spell on men to get them to love them, (Practical Magic) conniving bisexual icepick-toting criminals without underwear (Basic Instinct) and weak relationship junkies who will do anything, including prostitution (Pretty Woman) to get a man.

Films such as, Bridget Jones’s Diary, My Best Friend’s Wedding, What Women Want, The Wedding Planner, Someone Like You, Runaway Bride and others fuse a woman’s insecurities until she detonates in a string of bad relationships that sabotage her ultimate happiness. Films like these do more damage than good to a woman’s psyche, ego, self-esteem, self-respect and self-worth.

Just look at how many films have the word, ‘Wedding’ in them. Wedding Crashers, The Wedding Singer, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Four Weddings And A Funereal, Monsoon Wedding, The Wedding Banquet, The Wedding March, The Wedding Date and a bridal bouquet of others.

My former friend believed in the film version of relationships. She believed in the fairy tale wedding -- The Princess Diana Wedding. The white doves flying overhead, the balloons scattering, the Elizabeth and David Emanuel designer puff ball meringue dress with huge puffed sleeves and a full skirt of ivory silk pure taffeta, old lace and hand embroidery, incorporating 10,000 pearls and sequins with a twenty five foot train and a gilded horse-drawn carriage too petite to convey the gown’s girth.

I would often tell her to offer him friendship first and then see if he sticks around. I would say, “See what’s in his heart; what his intentions are?“ She still insisted that men didn’t want to be friends.

She eventually got married. Throughout the marriage, she would often complain of being unhappy. Her eyes were full of tears as they wandered. Her marriage barely lasted a couple of years. She found someone else immediately and married him -- and I never heard from her again. Just like that. Though we still live in the same city, I have yet to bump into her.

I still don’t know what happened to this day. Maybe she didn’t want to hear the truth anymore. The truth will set you free, but for some people, the truth impedes happiness.

I wish everyone could have ‘The Princess Diana Wedding,’ if that’s what they desire, but it’s not going to happen. Everyone is not karmically designed to have that. There’s nothing wrong with being focused on the relationship of self. Some of us believe in finding destiny within our own spirit; our threshold for happiness.

If you can be happy alone, then you will always be happy. Any relationship is just the gravy. Your true marriage is between you and your Soul. That’s the supreme commitment and communion. That’s when the wedding march in your Soul plays. Only you can hear it and only you can control the tempo. It’s something that will make you wonder why you haven’t done it before.

Have you ever wondered what you would find if you started searching? Have you ever wondered what you will find if you stop searching?

Maybe I could merge my ideas with Hollywood. I could write a script that will satisfy men and women. I’ll call it, Indiana Jones’ Diary. Now that would be a marriage made in heaven.

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It's Really Simple

Sometimes people can be like rats chasing cheese when it comes to love. It can be a chaotic, nerve-wracking and a matter of life and death chase.

It gets our adrenaline going, our heart pumping where we can hardly catch our breath.

When we finally surrender our ideals and preconceptions, real love begins to illustrate itself in our lives.

The colors are more magnificent that we could ever imagine and they run along our canvas to far reaching places in our Soul.

Love begins to illustrate our life. It illuminates us to no end and gives us wisdom beyond the ages.

It is a gift to ourselves and to those around us. Give it daily and you shall reap the colors of the spectrum.

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Precious Gift

I saw this on a forum the other day.

A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream. The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation.

The traveler left rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime. But, a few days later, he came back to return the stone to the wise woman.

"I've been thinking," he said. "I know how valuable this stone is, but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious. Will you give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me this stone?"

The woman took his hand and said, “You already have what it is that allowed me to give you the stone. You have the eyes to see.”

Sometimes it's not the wealth you have but what's inside your heart that others need.

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It Really Is A Word?

During my daily adventure into the pages of my favorite book -- the dictionary, I came upon a word that I found intriguing. It's a word that I hadn’t heard or seen before.

It’s a short word that looks a little unfinished; like it’s either the end of another word or the beginning of one, but it definitely did not look like a whole word by itself.

It’s an unusual sounding word. A funny looking word. However, it’s distinct qualities didn’t deter me from adopting it into my word repertoire. Words are like people; we need all kinds to work together. And now without further delay, I would like to introduce you to the newest member of my word family; my little bundle of joy.

This is Virga, (pronounced VUHR-guh.) It means rain or snow that evaporates before hitting the ground.

It kind of reminds me of being on the verge of something. Taking something out of the oven, just before it’s fully done; changing horses in the middle of the stream; or even giving up before your dream is realized.

You see, we are all here to make something of ourselves, not to just evaporate into the ethers before we make our mark. We are here to weather storms, to let lightening strike, to roll with the thunder, walk through the rain.

We can’t forget virga because we can’t become it. We can’t let ourselves evaporate before we hit the ground. Remember virga. Remember it well.

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Excuse My Uzi

As a spiritualist it is sometimes challenging to keep sane. There’s always that moment when we can chuck it all in for a demon. A demon that gets a hold of our Soul and doesn’t let go. A demon can be anything. Drugs, alcohol, anger, doubt, vanity, attachment, greed, bad T.V -- anything!

Demons cause demolition of our spirit. A deconstruction of everything we work so hard to construct. They can come in a split second or they can take years to manifest. That’s why you hear of usually calm people snapping. The demon has successfully made a hole in their tenor, taking them to the end of their tether.

That moment is always lurking like a hawk ready to swoop down and take us. That moment when we feel like we don’t have control. It’s that lurking moment that scares us because it can strike when we least expect it. However, relying on our inner spirit can help to make the moments better.

Case in point. I thought I was going to have a demonic moment, complete with blood curdling screams and all the bells a whistles of a true horror film. My normally calm disposition was under fire -- literally. Uzi machine gunfire. I was hit from all sides -- all four walls of my living room.

All because of Nestor. Nestor is an independent filmmaker from Australia who lives next door. He just finished shooting a war film and he has been editing it for two weeks now. There’s always something going on in there. Film industry types are in and out all day.

I’ll hear bits of dialogue. Then shouting, doors slamming, shooting, explosions and helicopters. All at full blast, while the walls shake and I try to compose words into sentences that make sense. (that’s why they are called sentences, because they’re supposed to make sense.) Then there’s the screaming. Mine.

It’s like I have been dropped into a sound factory and I don’t know what sound will crop up next. The Uzi is one of the most grating sounds ever -- next to nails on a chalkboard. The Uzi sounds like someone is banging pots and pans together in short sharp bursts, to be repeated over and over; making the short bursts, into long, loud excruciating sound passages.

I didn’t want to bang on the wall because he may have thought that was part of the sound. So I slipped Nestor a little note under his door, gently mentioning that other people live and work in the building too and that he couldn’t terrorize us with sound. Oh, and in typical L.A. style, I would have slipped my resume under the door, but I would save that for later, along with my synopsis for a silent film.

Then it hit me. Not the Uzi gunfire, but the realization. It’s just another test to see if I can concentrate on Spirit. That whole tension thing. A writer can’t live with it, but can’t write without it. Spirit can shake your world, but it will never let you out of its sight. (no gun pun intended)

When you are at the core of God, nothing can penetrate those pure walls, you’ll always have inner peace.

I also realized that I had a lot in common with the Nestor. We are both trying to make the moment better. He’s trying to find the perfect balance of sound and pictures and I am trying to find the balance of inner and outer life. His lies somewhere in the middle of Final Cut Pro, while mine lies somewhere in the middle of letting the outside world go.

Maybe we will meet somewhere in the middle, but I know we will both find what we are looking for. All it takes is the desire and will to succeed. And in the end, we will both make the moment better.

You can too. You can make your daily moments into pearls by letting go of trivial matters that weigh you down in thought and purpose. Release yourself into the core of God.

Perhaps with a few script notes, I can get Nestor to use rubber bullets; no harm, no sound. Rubber bullets in a war film? Now that would be worth watching. A silent war film? Hmmn?

We each have our own wars that we wage; some silent, some loud. If we can get through them, moment by moment, we will be victors and be able to raise our flag on our own sanity.

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Spring's The Thing

March is my favorite month. Not only does it host the opening of spring, but it hosts the spring of life. I started to think about the word spring and many things sprang forth. A spring lifts you. You can do your annual spring cleaning; then go to a hot springs while you add spring to your step.

The dictionary lists many definitions of spring; all interesting, I might add. Spring - to rise, leap, move, or act suddenly and swiftly, as by a sudden dart or thrust forward; being suddenly released from a coiled or constrained position; to come into being by growth, as from a seed; to take an upward course or curve from a point of support; a source or fountainhead of something: a spring of inspiration.

Since I couldn't decide which definition to write about, I will leave it up to you as to what part of spring inspires you. Personally, I feel lifted by Spring. It feels more like a beginning of the new year or cycle as opposed to January 1st. I feel more alive and harmonized with the universe.

Even the days are longer, which means I actually get to see more sunlight. And the fact that my birthday is in the Spring has nothing to do with it.

I got an email from Kate Nowak at Heartfelt Blessings that said it all:

"Do what makes you happiest. Look upon what gives you joy. Speak to those who warm your heart. Listen to that which lifts your spirit. Surround yourself with sights and sounds and people who give you pleasure. For all the happiness you give to others all year long, give yourself the perfect day. And then tomorrow, repeat the process.”

In creating my perfect day, I create everyday like Spring. What about you? How would you create your perfect day? What season are you? Remember not to be constrained in your spirit. Spring forward, spring high, spring long, spring now.

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Soul Standing

“The soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience.”

~Emily Dickinson

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