Okay we’ve made it through another week. Whew. Friday makes people happy. It makes people act the way they should act during the week. It’s magical. One thing is for sure, Friday gets a lot of love.
I don’t wait for Friday to feel the love, I do it daily. Why postpone joy? Anyway, if you’re feeling the love today, let me hear you say yeah.
This is one of my favorites songs by a band called, The New Radicals who broke up shortly after it became a hit. Even though it has the usual angst of a rock song, it still has a great message about not giving up on your dreams and being true to yourself.
It makes me feel good every time I hear it. If you don’t know it, please get to know it. Get to know your dreams and don’t give up. Remember you really do get what you give.
Sample lyrics.
"...But when the night is falling
And you cannot find the light
If you feel your dream is dying
Hold tight
You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget you only get what you give..."
You may want to check out the rest of the lyrics.
Yesterday I got my biannual teeth cleaning. Most people hate the dentist, in fact research over the past 45 years has found that dentists take their own lives at a high rate because they suffer from relatively low status within the medical profession and have strained relationships with their clients.
Though I’ve never had any major dental problems, I’ve never had anything to fear, however I still used to be a little anxious after hearing the dental horror stories.
Now it’s like a form of meditation, another opportunity to relax, give gratitude, and listen to the silence speak. I don’t know if it’s the reclining chair, the bright lights, the soft music, or the mural of clouds on the ceiling, but whatever it is puts me in “the zone.”
I lay there like a lifeless corpse while the sound of the instruments emulate a techno symphony. Between the probes, suction, scraper and polisher, I feel like Frankenstein’s monster getting a spit shine.
As the dentist does a final exam, I hear the song in his head playing. The song he doesn’t know I hear. The song he doesn’t know breaks my heart. The song he doesn’t know I see in his eyes. A sad song.
It’s Bonnie Raitt singing, “I Can’t Make You Love Me.” Bonnie is breaking it down, laying it on the line.
“Turn down the lights, turn down the bed
Turn down these voices inside my head
Lay down with me, tell me no lies
Just hold me close, don't patronize - don't patronize me
'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't
You can't make your heart feel something it won't
Here in the dark, in these final hours
I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power
But you won't, no you won't
'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't...”
The dentist’s expression interprets each line as he carefully removes his gloves and says, “Everything’s okay. I’ll see you next time.”
I just want to reach out and tell him, “I don’t hate you. You don’t have to kill yourself.” Not wanting him to think I have totally lost my mind, I bite my tongue, smile and say, “Thank you.”
Thank you for keeping my teeth in order, for keeping them out of harms way, for keeping them presentable, for doing a job that is under appreciated and I might ad, very well paid.
Sometimes, all you have to say is thank you and that’s enough to let a person know that they are appreciated. Next time you go to the dentist, show him/her a little love, and please don’t lie through your teeth. Give a heartfelt appreciation thank you. Who knows, you many even get a little discount. We can only hope, can’t we?
Here are some dental facts that you may find interesting.
Mondays are hard for many people. It’s like starting a cold engine. It may take a while for the engine to turn over, and even longer for it to warm up.
The weekend teases us into thinking we are free from the rigors of work. The secret to surviving Monday is knowing that we can get through it with flying colors.
Sometimes, we need reminders to give us our wings. Following are tips co-opted by Spiritual.com.au, a cornucopia of spiritual delights.
Take time to read them and let them wash over you like a warm wave. Refer to them daily or whenever you need a boost. Whatever you do, give gratitude that your are beginning another week of discovery.
My brain is on a feeding frenzy 24/7. I can’t shut it off or lock the fridge of knowledge. The days are getting shorter and my work pile is getting taller. I’m trying to keep up -- with myself.
Though I am extremely focused, I sometimes get distracted by knowledge -- the bread of life. I already know that there is no way I can use everything I know because the more I know, the more I don’t know -- that’s just the way it is.
Even while I sleep, my brain is still gathering food to pile on my plate. Puzzles to solve, equations to work out, lots of busy work with purpose, some for fun, but most for the pleasure of using my organic headquarters. The brain doesn’t come with instructions or a warranty -- just have to use it or lose it.
So what’s the point? I still have to give my brain something to do while my Soul is in the control room charting my real destiny. As my brain sharpens my utensils, preparing my incisors to gnaw, my Soul is negotiating the karmic curves at breakneck speed. It’s not just knowing something as much as it is just knowing.
The real knowledge is what your Soul collects and recollects. Don’t let the real knowledge in you die. Don’t go down without a fight for your right to know why you are on this planet. One day my brain will rest in peace, but my Soul will always be wide awake in consciousness.
I am the first to admit, I hate gardening. My senses go into overload. I hate the smell, the feel, the bending, the kneeling, the soil, my skin getting sun-soaked, my eyes watering, my nose running and my clothes getting dirty.
I am so happy that this new complex has gardeners. That means, I don’t have to lift a finger -- or hire a gardener to do my dirty work.
When I went to England five years ago, the highlight of my visit was meeting my friend’s lovely family, especially his mother, Mathia, who has a beautiful green thumb. Everyday, rain or shine you can find her in orange Wellington boots surveying her magnificent 130 foot English garden.
It’s a picture postcard of a idyllic landscape. A real Garden of Eden. She proudly takes in it’s luscious green grass -- the most alluring grass I’ve ever seen -- like it was 3 dimensional -- almost like CGI, without the CGI. The kind of grass you could roll around in all day.
Her eyes scan the sky high conifer trees and various plants and shrubs with precision. Nothing is out of place. They are her babies and she looks after them well.
She does everything -- and I mean everything herself. She grows tomatoes, spring onions, cucumbers, spinach, vine leaves, apples, pears, plums, figs, parsley, mint, cilantro, multicolored roses, orchids, carnations, snap dragons, daffodils, tulips, marigolds, gladiolas and more depending on the season.
She’s either using a trowel, hand fork, shears, or shovel most of the time. She also cuts the grass on a riding lawn mower and waters it by hand with a long hose.
She doesn’t wear sunblock, a hat, glasses, or a surgeon’s mask like I would, yet she has the most splendid olive complexion that I have ever seen. Her eyes are full of warmth and tenderness, the kind that take a hold of your Soul and surround you in love.
Gardening makes her happy and it shows on all counts. She puts so much love and devotion into cultivating her plants that you can really see it, taste it and feel it and it is amazing. When we put our all into something, our all comes through.
I think that’s the key; finding our threshold for happiness. We all know our threshold for pain, so why not reverse our thinking and go for happiness?
Though I don’t have a green thumb, I do have an E-thumb. I love anything electronic -- gadgets, devices, etc. Anything that pushes the electronic envelope. I love computing, I can navigate the web within seconds and find interesting sites that transcend my consciousness.
I have a number of things that make me happy and I make sure I do one, some, most or all of them on a daily basis. I think that’s the secret to life. We have to find out what and who we are suited for. What jobs, people, lifestyle, etc. and what makes the happiest fit. We can’t stop until we find something. And everyone has their something.
We don’t need a green thumb to cultivate our garden. If we don’t cultivate our own garden, we won’t see or appreciate our spiritual growth.
Sure, we may sweat, get dirty, tired, disappointed and the like, but in the long run we are cultivating a stunning landscape. A place we can be proud of. A place of remarkable splendor, where we can hold our heads high even if we’re feeling low. We know we are creating a place in our Soul which no one can take away from us.
My outer green thumb may leave something to be desired, but my inner green thumb is always working -- planting, clipping, weeding, and watering. My inner garden is forever blossoming, preparing me for full bloom in consciousness while propelling me towards spiritual freedom.
That’s worth all of the bending, kneeling, watering eyes, runny nose and digging into the soil. Have you ever noticed that there is only one letter difference between soil and Soul? They are kind of similar, both require care and attention to bear the fruits of labor.
Epilogue:
Recently, Mathia has been having problems with foxes and squirrels wreaking havoc on her heavenly paradise. She made a scarecrow, by putting a long stick into the ground, sticking a pillow onto the stick, adding layers of old clothes to it and a Fedora. Why not a tin man, a cowardly lion, Dorothy and Toto too for good measure?
Obviously the foxes and squirrels didn’t mind the company of the scarecrow and they continued their pillaging. Mathia has finally broken down and gotten a bebe gun -- this is war -- no one threatens her babies.
She has added target practice to her gardening duties. All I can say is that the foxes and squirrels should pray. If her rifle finger is as good as her green thumb, God help them.
"Only by much searching and mining are gold and diamonds obtained, and man can find every truth connected with his being if he will dig deep into the mine of his soul."Read more...
~ James Allen
Sometimes I read military blogs and let me tell you, there is a lot to be learned from soldiers. They are dealing with the darker side of man; a bleak reality that no matter how you slice it, it’s no picnic.
War -- any war is not a place you want to be or a place that you ever forget. The following words came from a soldier as he was about to go to war. I think it stands true for everyone. We each have our own wars to deal with, the battle of one is no less than the battle of another.
As we move forward to find our own peace, lets not forget that we are all in it together.
It’s a ritual. Though I look forward to everyday, I especially anticipate Friday. It’s the day earmarked for reflection. I call it gratitude Friday.
As soon as I rise in the morning, I take my selection of fruit from the freezer that I have personally sliced and diced a week prior. Usually pineapple, mango, watermelon and strawberries are the fruit of choice.
Then I take strawberry/banana or piña colada yogurt and apple juice from the fridge and one banana from the counter.
I gently move the blender into position to fill it’s hungry orifice and satisfy it’s every desire to be fulfilled. Slowly I pour the juice into the glass tower until it’s half filled.
I break the banana up and place it into the juice. I spoon the yogurt carefully around the banana and drop frozen chunks of fruit on top.
Then (and this is the hardest part), I press the smoothie button on the blender and ten seconds later, I have the most mouth-watering elixir of life -- a tropical fruit smoothie. Cocktail umbrella optional.
The reason I look forward to these days is not for the smoothies themselves, but for what happens as I drink the smoothie. I find a quiet place, turn the world off and give gratitude for everything I have.
I find that this exercise is the best way to open my heart and be thankful for everything in which God has blessed me.
You can do it too. Take time out our your day. Stop thinking what you’re thinking for a moment. Give your mind the rest and relaxation it craves. Let your spirit splash over you and bask in the limelight of your god self.
Happy gratitude.
My former plumber doesn’t like to make appointments. I used to call him to make an appointment and he would say, “Call me back in five minutes.”
When I call him back five minutes later, he says, “Call me back in an hour.” I call him back in an hour and he says, “Call me back in ten minutes.” This could go on for several hours. It’s so much cloak and dagger that it’s funny.
He’s always booked solid. Although, he’s a good plumber, he can’t commit to a time. He’s been “dating” a woman for 15 years. He won’t marry her because he’s not sure. Sure of what? Again, he can’t commit. If he waits any longer, the milk will turn sour.
What makes people afraid of commitment? Is it the fact that they want to keep their options open? What does that mean, “You’ll do for now until someone better comes along?”
People are not cars, they don’t come with interchangeable options. We all want to love and be loved. That’s the basis for our existence. Who can we love? Who can return our love?
Committing ourselves fully and honestly in any relationship can be so rewarding. It can redefine who we are, teach us aspects about ourselves that we never knew and enhance our character.
When we are committed to one person, it’s like saying to that person, “You are the one I want. There is no one else.” And that’s is the biggest compliment you can give a person.
Though some people stay together for years, there are times when commitment to one no longer works. That’s simply because we learned all that we could from the other individual and we have to move on for our own evolution.
It doesn’t necessarily mean the person is bad, just that we have run our course with them. All in all, to commit is to face yourself in the reflection of someone else and we should never be afraid to look at ourselves.
As you know, Friday was supposed to be the internet cable hook up day -- and I stress -- “supposed to be.” With my nose pressed to the window, I waited like a little puppy anticipating her master coming home. While looking at every vehicle that resembled a cable van, my tail wagged in excitement.
Seconds became minutes, minutes became hours, day became night. “No this can’t be happening,” I thought. “Not today. Not now.” With my equanimity at stake, I reverted the anxiety to a gentle undulating tide, repeating the surfer’s credo to myself, “Know the wave. Become the wave. Love the wave.”
At this point, the cable man showing up really didn’t matter. It was more of a game to see “when” he would come as opposed to “if.” It wasn’t a matter of life and death. “He’ll come when he comes,” I mused.
I decided to just go out to dinner and forget about cabling up. I met some new neighbors and they told me how when they moved into the complex, a couple of weeks before me, there was a 50 foot scaffold that blocked their front door. They couldn’t even move in until two days later. They had to leave their stuff on the moving truck.
Here I was thinking of the trivial cable guy and my new neighbors had it worse. (If you call not having cable bad, which I don’t.)No matter what battle we’re fighting, there’s always someone fighting a bigger battle. It’s all a matter of where we put our attention.
I went back home and started unpacking more boxes, until 3 AM, which is normal for me to be awake at that time. I find it the most peaceful part of the day to merge with the twilight -- the moon -- the stars -- the universe -- the fade to blackness.
Cut to Saturday morning: The door bell sounds at 6:30 am sharp. I thought I was dreaming - hoping it was a bad dream. Who would ring the door bell at such an ungodly hour anyway? It sounded again, shaking me out of what may have been a blissful slumber.
I looked out of the window and I saw a guy standing at the door with a tool belt. It was the cable guy. I really didn’t want to open the door, but I figured, I was already up.
Through the door, a tall, muscular figure says, “I’m here to install your cable.”
“It’s 6:30 in the morning,” I say.
“Your neighbors sent me. They said you were waiting since Friday.” he mentions.
“I was”, I state gently.
“Sorry about that, he expresses. The truck broke down. The office was supposed to phone you, but you didn’t have a phone.”
“Yes, you guys were going to hook the phone up too, ” I remind him.
“I mean, you don’t have a cell phone, “ he says puzzled.
“No, I gave that up. Got tired of the poor quality, the dropped calls and the stack of surcharges for non usage,” I explain, still speaking through the door.
“Do you still want cable?,” his voice inquires.
“Why not, you’re here now. If I send you away, I may never see you again,” I joke.
I opened the door, and greeted my friendly cable man face to face. I felt we had already made a connection (get it) through the door. Since the place was prewired for cable, all I had to do was show him the devices and he did the rest.
Like a skilled master, he took out the appropriate tools for the device. He clipped a few cables, screwed them into their receptacles, and tested them to see if they worked. After a relatively short stay, he hooked up the phone, internet. and T.V. -- the juice -- the electronic elixir -- the life everlasting.
Hark, yes there is life in the universe now that I am back on the fiber optics super highway and no longer on the side of the road with the hood up and the hazards going. I can feel my fingers glide across these magical keys once more as I chant to myself, "Know the wave. Become the wave. Love the wave."
I am a wave. I am a wave in the ocean of life. Surf’s up.
These library computers are not that bad. Sometimes if you don’t reserve one, there is a slight wait, but all in all, not too bad. Time Warner Cable is coming this afternoon to finally hook me up. That is, if they can get through the throng of paparazzi, reporters, camera crews, police escorts, motorcade and the deafening sounds of helicopters.
“Is the president in town,” you say? You would think that wouldn’t you? But NO, it’s that superficially blonde heiress -- AGAIN, thankfully she’s not driving this time.
Today, she’s traded the keys to her $170,000-plus Bentley Continental GTC and her $400,000 Mercedes-Benz SLR with scissor doors, for an ordinary black and white cruiser with four ordinary doors and a cage in the back. She’s being driven by a designated driver in squad car number 865, compliments of the L.A. County Sheriff.
Not only is there a lot of traffic today, but people seem to be elated about Paris’ fate. Strangers are speaking to each other, greeting each other with smiles and engaging in meaningful conversations. People are celebrating, having parties, tossing confetti from high-rises. They are just happy about Paris’ return to the jail (affectionately known as the glass house because it has no windows.)
Although, this post didn’t start out about Paris Hilton, I find that my fingers are automatically typing what they want. It’s the story behind the story. I have to go to Paris’ humble Hollywood Hills abode (approximately 3,000 square feet) and put a candle in front of it with a thank you note.
I’d like to thank her for being out of the media for the 45 days (or 23 for good behavior) that she’ll be in jail. Now maybe I’ll finally be able to find out what’s happening in the world without her face being pixeled all over flat screens of the world, monopolizing news channels, like it’s a matter of life and death. I don’t think I’ve seen a newscast in it’s entirety in recent months that didn’t mention Paris Hilton and her woes.
I bet she would trade lives with anyone now. Anyone, even a homeless person. That’s the irony. Someone like her who seems to have everything from the outside doesn’t have it all. She seems to lack the integrity and self-respect that is needed to really evolve.
She may have all the opportunities that money can buy, but her Soul is starving. She’s just another hamster on the wheel of fate who has fallen off and spinning out of control. She has to face herself honestly and completely and take inventory of her life.
While she carefully chooses the right color blue contacts, the precise shade of blonde hair extensions, the right makeup and right designer clothes, inside her Soul goes ungroomed and rejected by a stronger desire to be lavishly shallow.
Note to Paris Hilton: When you behave in a less than desirable way, or in a way where you take advantage of others or treat them egregiously, there are consequences. When you have no self-respect, no one with self-respect will respect you.
When you find yourself in a pickle, no amount of money, lawyers, power or fame will set you free. No amount. Money is meaningless to God. Lawyers are not above the law of God. Fame is fleeting.
When you’re in over your head, a lawyer may be able to rescue you temporarily, but a lawyer can't teach you how to swim. You eventually have to save yourself -- swim for it -- and the force greater than you will assist you. You want your life back? Swim for it.
The only real power is the force of God. When the force comes down, it can be like a million sledgehammers to your Soul.
That same force can also show you a connection to life and love that is so incredible that you will be set for life. It gives you great insight and wisdom. It forgives you in ways that you can’t even forgive yourself. It is worth more than anything. And I mean anything.
It is all you need to get you through this maze. It will empower you if you let it. It will unleash your inner God and I know one is there, hidden under all of the trappings that make you famous.
We have to take responsibility for our actions. We can’t act irresponsibly, treat people horrendously and keep smiling. Everything we do has a consequence. Life has consequences -- all of life -- good and bad.
Everything we do comes back to us -- good and bad. Everything. When you understand this principle of life, you will understand the principles of living. Life is truly and I repeat truly what you make it.
More on the cable connection update on Monday.
Since moving to new digs, I am still transitioning, knee deep in the circus of unpacking, scheduling and rescheduling various service vendors to connect and disconnect, gas, electricity, phone, internet, cable etc. So far, NONE of it has happened yet and I’m sitting in a lightless room with the radiant glow of my laptop screen illuminating my countenance like a firefly in the night and warming my fingertips like a cup of chai.
Since this a new development, it’s still in the infancy stages, meaning things that they planned have either been disastrous, or a bad idea from the start.
One case, being the alarm monitoring system. It works through the internet, which is powered by the mighty Time Warner Cable, but if the cable goes down, so does the alarm monitoring. Too much technology. Didn’t they think of this before they decided to go this route?
Another miscomputation is that the development is so new that the normal phone companies don’t service the area -- so that too has to come through the cable company’s new phone division which will be VOIP (Voice Over Internet Protocol) -- another technology that interrupts the alarm monitoring. See, I told you -- too much technology.
Even the post office doesn’t recognize this address on their postal address template, which causes confusion for banking institutions, credit card companies, utility companies and would-be identity thieves. And get this -- even Time Warner Cable, (who services the area) can’t find it in their system, although I see their white vans outside my window.
The planning geniuses didn’t think things through. The best laid plans are quite simply plans -- period. You need a blueprint to accomplish amazing feats. You need a plan. Then you need a plan B, if anything goes wrong.
It’s like writing a screenplay. You just can’t decide to write a film one day and do it. (although many films look that way) Other than dexterity, you need to plan. You need good characters. A clear cut beginning, middle and end, someone to root for and something important must depend on the outcome.
Let’s see, we have a good character; Alexys. A clear cut beginning, a muddy middle, but no end in sight yet. Not good. Alexys must go through hell. Good. The conflict gives us someone to root for if we have the sympathy from the beginning.
Something important must depend on the outcome -- light, heat, electricity, phone and of course, internet and cable. Most screenplays fall apart in the middle, this is no different. We need to fortify the middle and show little triumphs over obstacles. (getting at least one utility connected)
Though life is not like a box of chocolate, it is like a screenplay. We have series of events where we feel we are up against the wall and we have to find our resolve. We have to rely on our ingenuity to propel us through the situation unscathed. If we develop a strong resolve, we are satisfied knowing that we did the best we could. Like in a film, a strong resolution leaves us feeling satiated.
Chances are if you don’t have a plan that you will end up with mud on your face. Unless you want to walk around with a face full of mud, that means your plan (or lack thereof) is probably not doable. Imagine cooking without yeast, running without shoes or worse without feet. Granted, sometimes you can’t plan and things don’t happen the way you plan them. So be prepared to roll with the punches.
So I sit here in this unyielding library chair rolling with it, in what fellow blogger extraordinaire, Raffi refers to it, ‘stickin and movin,’ while I transcribe notes that were fired up in darkness. I pause to peruse my mental dictation, hoping not to produce verbigeration in trying to make sense of this technology conundrum.
Ah, the keyboard doth bring me solace in a blogtastical harmony. I’m not reliant on locked and loaded fiber optics hyperactively converting light to electricity and firing through the wires to assemble clear voices, ambient resonance and crisp HD spitting images in millions of colors and sizes. While it’s true, one’s sighs fits all, I am resigned to sit here as long as it takes to splash these words onto this screen with a song in my heart.
I see my reflection in an optical fiber. An optical fiber is a glass or plastic fiber designed to guide light along its length by confining as much light as possible in a propagating form. In fibers with large core diameter, the confinement is based on total internal reflection. That’s me, ‘total internal reflection.’
While I wait to be in the loop once again, I remember the line from Rocky.
“It really don't matter if I lose this fight. It really don't matter if this guy opens my head, either. 'Cause all I wanna do is go the distance. Nobody's ever gone the distance with Creed, and if I can go that distance, you see, and that bell rings and I'm still standin', I'm gonna know for the first time in my life, see, that I weren't just another bum from the neighborhood.”
If Rocky can go the distance, so can I, no matter how long it takes, the distance is the only way to measure growth.
Transition - movement, passage, or change from one position, state, stage, subject, concept, etc., to another; change.
Sometimes I feel like I’m being split in two -- living in two bodies -- two worlds -- two universes. The duality of inner and outer worlds can be very daunting and time consuming, but not without its own rewards.
After all, being in two places at once, I am used to moving constantly, feeling the inner cogs turning and pushing me to the next stratosphere. Twice as hard equals twice the fun, right?
So now I am moving again. This time to a new house. A really new house. It has just been built and finally ready for its first inhabitant. It's part of a new development, a new community. It’s actually on the same site that Steven Spielberg wanted for Dreamworks Studios, but he couldn’t work out the deal with the city. He wanted too much and they wanted too much.
It was supposed to be finished in February, but things in construction are never exact. As you can imagine, it has been extremely hectic for the past several months. Contractors, realtors, bankers, escrow, APR’s, phone calls, change of address, boxes, change of service, moving trucks, change of location, change of change.
Don’t get me wrong. I love change. I embrace it. I look forward to it. I relish it. Change only brings good things. So many people are afraid of it.
We are either in two states -- flux or rest. Sometimes our flow is rampant and other times, it’s a soft wave, but we are still flowing. I won’t have the internet for a couple of days until the cable guy shows up and we all know how that can be.
I will be back to blogging as soon as I complete the transition. God, I love change. Hopefully that won’t be too long. Just know that I’ll be thinking of you all and wishing that I was there.
Once I sent a script to Spielberg -- never heard from him. Now there’s something comforting knowing that the mighty Spielberg himself once wanted something that I now have. Maybe I could rent a room to him and I can write his next movie. With change, anything is possible.
“There is not any present moment that is unconnected with some future one. The life of every man is a continued chain of incidents, each link of which hangs upon the former. The transition from cause to effect, from event to event, is often carried on by secret steps, which our foresight cannot divine, and our sagacity is unable to trace.”
~Joseph Addison
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